Wednesday, May 19, 2004

it's a work in progress.

According to the very funny sarah b., there are two kinds of love: the prescriptive kind (you-are-exactly-what-I-have-been-searching-for) and the "punched the throat" kind (you-are-everything-I-never-knew-I-wanted-so-desperately).

I confess, I have loved prescriptively. E is the person in the world I most wish was a boy so I could marry her and love her forever. In her absence, I realize that I am slowly trying to convert my boy in some version of her.

But there is only one of E.

Me: Do you think of yourself as schemey? (pronounced: scheme-mee)
B: What do you mean by schemey?
Me: Schemey. You know, like you have lots of schemes for things. Schemey.
B: Well, I have this goal to play at all the different golf courses in LA County. I'm about a third of the way there, or so. Is that a scheme?
Me: Hmmm. Kind of. It would be more of a scheme if you had a chart or something. Or if you felt that your playing at a zillion different golf courses would somehow figure into your eventual goals for total world domination.
B: I think I'm too lazy to make a chart.
Me: Actually following through on the scheme is not as important to being schemy as just having the scheme in the first place. Laziness is really the only thing that keeps E and I from becoming despotic leaders of our own small island nations.
B: I see. Maybe I'm not schemy then.
Me: Maybe not.
(Pauses thoughtfully.)
Me: We'll have to work on that.

posted by m at 6:05 PM



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